Tuesday, January 23, 2018

The Call of Duty

by John Boodhansingh of Zero Mindfulness

Updated 3/4/21: [“Ignorance” section completely rewritten and “Fearlessness” section partially rewritten.]

When we think of people such as firefighters, police officers, soldiers, and so on, we often think of characteristics such as “bravery” and “courage.”

While at times these may be accurate descriptions, I’m going to suggest that many times they’re not.

The reason for this is that the outward behaviors of those who are brave and courageous can appear strikingly similar to the behaviors of people who are prideful, wanting, ignorant, fearless, and/or supernaturally fearless.


It seems that pride has two very different connotations, so much so that we probably shouldn’t be using the same word for both traits.

Negatively, pride can be understood as arrogance. As in, I’m better than you because I’m bigger, better, faster, smarter, stronger, etc. This is a problem since it’s self- and/or exclusive-group-centered as well as being very dualistic and unhealthily competition-oriented.

Positively, I see nothing wrong with a general sense of pride. There’s nothing wrong with saying, for example, I built this, and I feel good about my work.

Where pride applies to the point of this article is when it’s negatively-oriented; when it’s focused in a “this is who I am/we are” mentality that’s underlined with needs to be good enough, to prove one’s worth, to validate one’s self as relevant.

When someone is prideful, and especially when embedded deeply, there is an internal fog such that there is a loss of perceptual acuity as to what they are truly experiencing. In some cases, this could be described as a “Tough Guy Syndrome”—the prideful one becomes lost in needing to be a certain way and may go so far as to put their life on the line in attempt to get what they want.


Wanting is similar to pride in that it, too, is underscored by a need to be good enough, to prove one’s worth, to validate one’s self as relevant.

Where wanting differs from pride is in whom the object of wanting is sought: pride is more often found in a non-familial group setting while wanting is more common to family.

For example: A man enters the police force and later has a son. This son, seeking his father’s love and approval, also enters the police force. Later he has a son of his own. This son/grandson, on seeing his father’s behavior and how he seemingly receives love and approval from his own father, comes to believe that if he joins the police force then he will also gain his father’s love and approval.

None of them ever realize, if in fact it’s true, that their fathers will love and approve of them exactly as they are regardless of whether they join the force or not. Nor does it occur to them, if their fathers do deny love and approval, that they don’t need the love and approval of their fathers for survival, to be happy, or any such thing. Yes, it would be nice, preferable, etc., but it’s not a requirement; if their hurt is resolved within, then they can live peacefully whether the fatherly love and approval is there or not.

Whatever the case, son after son willingly become police officers. People see them as “brave” or “fearless,” but truly, they’re doing it for love and approval. They see potential self-sacrifice as the ultimate price for the ultimate prize: father’s love and approval.

This wanting-based behavior is likely more prevalent in families carrying a “manliness” mentality as well as in families with multiple siblings due to sibling rivalry.


When I was in high school, I had the intention of joining the Marines. Enlistment often comes after graduation, but because I’d screwed up my wrist a few years earlier, I figured I’d first  go to college and then join, with the assumption that my wrist would be healed by then.

In my first year of college, which was just a few years after 9/11 and the War on Terror had begun, I met a guy who’d recently gotten out of the army. We were talking on the way to class one day, and he, not approving of the war, said something to me like, “War sucks, man. You take it so lightly now. But are you going to be smiling like that when you get into a firefight and take a hot one in the ass?” Ignorant and (excessively) naive me just laughed off his comment. That’s where the conversation ended since we’d arrived at class.

Although I most certainly should have, I’d never thought seriously about the guy’s comment. I’d never thought seriously about any of that stuff. I’d spent most of my life quite emotionally detached and numb. Furthermore, no one close to me had ever died or been severely injured, so I had no concept for the reality of that type of struggle or death. And I’d long played violent, gory shoot-em-up games, such as Doom and Wolfenstein, wherein health was a medi-pack away, and life and mistakes could instantly be restored from a previous save state—and, of course, IDDQD and IDKFA (…the god-mode and all-weapons-ammo-and-keys cheat codes for Doom… obviously…). Surely, a situation such as the one that guy suggested couldn’t happen to me…

A couple years later, a friend who was in the Marines told me how on his day of graduation from boot camp, when they were being handed their Marine Corp pins, he and others had this idea like, When do we become Marines? Aren’t we supposed to feel different? Shouldn’t this award bring an a-ha kind of moment, with a flood of self-confidence and fearlessness?

My friend soon realized that the completion of basic training and the bestowal of an award don’t mean much of anything to the extent that internal growth and self-awareness must necessarily come from within.

I’m about 99.8% positive that if I’d have gone through basic I would have been waiting for that a-ha moment for years. I was way too fearful and way too ignorant. I was way too caught up in my naive ideas about “how life is.”

I wonder how many other people are in a similar boat, one crafted of fear and painted over in ignorance, perhaps following an imagined call of duty with the belief that life is daisies and in hopes that one day some external source will hand them some kind of self-realization…


Barring issues of pride, wanting, and ignorance which mask fear, sometimes fear simply has no place. In these situations, we can’t exactly then call certain actions “brave.”

If someone were afraid to leave their house, it might be said that they’re “brave” just for opening their front door. Yet to the billions of people who open their front doors thousands of times each year as they step freely outside, both bravery and fear are irrelevant.

When I was in high school, my grandfathers, both of whom had been in the military, would periodically ask me if I’d ever thought of joining. I’d always given them a most definite no.

Then when I was about 17, I was preparing flags for a flag retirement ceremony for Boy Scouts when the most inexplicable of things happened. Completely out of the blue, I felt what I can only describe as an energetic weight lifting out from within my shoulders, as though an invisible body were leaving my body. I immediately had the thought, I’m going to join the Marines.

In a flash, some heavy fear energy I’d been carrying, but had been completely unknown to me, departed from my body and resulted in a radical shift in my perception.

As it turned out, I never ended up in the Marines, most notably because I’d really screwed up my wrist when playing drums and it never healed.

If I’d have gone into the Marines, I’d still have had an enormous number of fears that I’d have had to deal with; internally, I was a very weak person. However, in light of this fear-energy release that I’d had, it seems to me that I’d still have been able to do what many others could not. And for those things, although people might have called them “brave” or “valiant,” they might not have been that way at all—to whatever extent, just an absence of fear.

(Notice: I’d immediately decided to join the Marines: “The few. The proud.” Out of the frying pan and into the fire: a strong fear departs and reveals a new layer of false ego: pride. If I’m going to do it, I have to be the best.)

Supernatural Fearlessness

On p.120 of the novel Black Hawk Down: A Story of Modern War, Mark Bowden writes:
He would think about this a lot later, and the best he could explain it was, his own life no longer mattered. All that did matter were his buddies, his brothers, that they not get hurt, that they not get killed. These men around him, some of whom he had only known for months, were more important to him than life itself. It was like when Telscher ran out on the road to pull Joyce back in. Carlson understood that now, and it was heroic, but it also wasn’t heroic. At a certain level he knew Telscher had made no choice, just as he was not choosing to be unafraid. It had just happened to him, like he had passed through some barrier. He had to keep fighting, because the other guys needed him.
This passage from Black Hawk Down so clearly expresses another alternate reason for action: supernatural fearlessness. As much as the actions described may appear “brave,” such a quality may not play any role, or a minimal role at best. For there is something innate to humans that spontaneously arises from within us that pushes us beyond any ego identity, any fear, any pride, any anything that would hold us back.

This has been shown with everyone from soldiers to average folks. It could be that the wimpiest, weakest kid in the neighborhood is out for a walk when he notices a house on fire. Without thinking, he dashes inside and pulls out a 250lb. woman.

How in the world!? we’d think. But sometimes it just happens. The kid wasn’t otherwise brave by any stretch of the imagination, probably couldn’t do a single pull-up, and probably would have floundered about uselessly had he began thinking before acting. When duty called, a "mere" human showed superhuman ability.

Closing Thoughts

If my house were burning and a firefighter came in and saved me, if a psycho broke into my house and was threatening to kill me and a police officer came in and busted a cap in his ass, if my country were under attack by members of a Luciferian shadow government and the armed forces went in and took them out, make no mistake, I would be most grateful. I acknowledge that, whatever the reason, not everyone is fit for these lines of work.

All the same, I question, and I encourage you to question, especially if you are in the lines of work discussed here, what really is the driving factor(s) of what you do?

Is it truly bravery or courage or valor?

Or could it be pride or wanting or ignorance?

Could it be fearlessness?

Or do you experience supernatural fearlessness, as expressed in the passage from Black Hawk Down, on a recurrent basis?

Whatever the case, my sense is that what we call “bravery” is often something different—potentially very different. If I’m correct, it would therefore benefit everyone for those who see themselves as “brave” to self-inquire as to what that word really means to them.

What really is your call of duty?

Sunday, January 14, 2018

Finding Your Path, Finding Your Purpose

by John Boodhansingh of Zero Mindfulness

You’re in a predicament.

Since Day 1, the world has been telling you what to do and how to do it, and what not to do and how not to do it.

You realize this is deeply unsatisfying, but, If I don't do that, then

What do I do???

First Thing’s First


You don’t always have to do. Sometimes it’s better to spend some time to be, because simple being is the place from which what you could/should/need to do springs.

Then consider…

What Are You Passionate About? What Do You Have a Talent For?

There’s a good chance you already know the answer to these questions. You may have pushed your passion/talent away for 10 or 40 years, but I suspect many of you already know. It’s likely you’ve had a brief, or maybe not so brief, run-in with it.

Maybe you’d played violin for 6 months and loved it, but then your mom got angry at you and threw your violin out the window. Or maybe you were getting into gardening and had just bought a few flowers, only to take them home and be told by your father, “Flowers are for pussies, pussy.” Or maybe you were into [insert your passion here], but The System ground you down and reprogrammed you into a cubical-inhabiting robot. In all cases, you'd given up.

Whatever lit you up in the past, do it again.

Or maybe your past experience wasn’t so traumatic and you’ve been doing your thing all along but just haven’t taken it to the next level. Why not take it to the next level?

Some of you may contend that, “I can’t make a living out of it.” By all means, be practical where appropriate, but don’t allow yourself to get caught up in mind-traps that cannot be proven and may well be false.

We’ve been taught that it’s dangerously unwise to go out on a limb and do something that we cannot forecast the outcome of at least five years in advance. (Oddly enough, the weatherman is still well-paid, and he can hardly forecast into the next fucking day!) Yet living with passion often requires us to let go and trust that life will provide what we need when we need it.

If you truly can’t make a living out of your talent, this doesn’t mean you shouldn’t bother with it. If it’s what lifts your spirit, you’ll lead a far more fulfilling life by playing guitar or connecting with lonely people at a homeless shelter for only a few hours per week than if you do nothing at all.


If you don’t feel compelled to a certain past activity, my advice is: Try stuff. You’ll naturally go toward something of interest.

Be conscious of what you feel before getting into an activity, when you actually do it, and then after any number of instances with it. Self-inquire and pay attention because feelings are not always as they seem.

In example, if you feel fear about trying something:
  1. maybe it’s actually excitement bubbling to get out,
  2. maybe it’s a fear that your parents will condemn you for doing something they perceive “unsafe” or “idiotic,” and/or
  3. maybe you’re simply at the edge of your comfort zone.
Alternately, you may feel interested in a thing but then experience a drop in energy. Again, inquire. On one hand, you could believe you’re incapable and unworthy, and so your body is expressing this mentality. On the other hand, you might be interested because, say, your father had once told you, “This is what real men do,” and you’re still trying to prove to both him and yourself that you’re a “real man.” Your energy tanks simply because the activity isn’t true to you.

What Catches Your Attention?

Another way to utilize self-inquiry is to see what piques your interest in what you’re already doing in everyday life, even if it’s sort of lame.

For example, you might ask yourself what catches your interest when you watch TV. It’s easy to be drawn in by the glamor which is rarely if ever realistic, but you may also feel drawn for a better reason.

Maybe you’re compelled by a really good show because you have the potential to be an actor. Contrarily, maybe you’re already an “actor” in the sense that you’re a “chameleon”; meaning that, out of fear of disapproval, you become who everyone else wants you to be and change per situation and peer group. Real actors pique your interest because they reflect your (false) ability to “color shift.” If you could see this about yourself and heal it, your new-found integrity would probably provide for you a much better sense as to what you’re best suited to do.

Alternately, maybe what compels you to the same TV show is the fact that it takes place in a beautiful wooded area, and the interest is actually your soul drawing you to become an outdoorsman.

Develop Your Self-Awareness

A key in knowing what to do with yourself is resolving inner issues because these are what block self-awareness, possibility, and potential.

Self-awareness is about knowing what you’ve come here to do or is at least within your soul's interest in doing. If you are living unconsciously, you may have, say, an interest in and even a strong knack for accounting. While there’s nothing wrong with this, for all you know, maybe you’ve unconsciously taken to accounting because
  1. your parents are both accountants and you’re still seeking to fulfill your inner-child’s need for your parents’ unconditional love and approval, and thus
  2. your soul is using accounting as an external mirror to reflect your inner need to account for your own life.
As long as your awareness is thoroughly focused on what you believe you’re here for, you’ll likely never see better paths. If you do, you’ll justify why you cannot take them and continue plodding along on the “tried-and-false.”

That said, expanded possibility and potential are the obvious outcome to self-awareness. We are as limited without as we are limited within.

Objection: “But I Can’t Just Leave My Job—I Need the Money!”

You have to do what you have to do. You may have to work as a part-time waitress or a full-time cubical-dweller, or maybe with a savings of $80,000 or $1,000 you just need to get out—now. I really can’t say what is appropriate for anyone at any given time. But it is very possible that to get moving on a passion you will have to walk out of something(s) you’ve been dependent on/attached to.

As much as possible, get your mind off money and possessions and all that oft-extraneous stuff. Also as much as possible, get your mind off the how’s and when’s and what-if’s and 5-year forecasts. When you drop out of the mindset of this is what I have to do and how I have to do it because this is what my family, religion, government, and pet sitter want of me, and you get on working to fulfill your soul reason for being here—your passion, your talent, your dream—life will provide you with what you need (resources, knowledge, connections, etc.) as you advance along the path.

When you’re dedicated to your purpose, ask Life for what you need or think you need (writing it out with specifics works well) and be grateful, like you already have it. Then be patient, but be mindful as to whether what you’ve requested may be on its way or maybe you’re asking incorrectly or for the wrong thing—in either case, life will give you signs if you ask.

And meaning this in the least egoically-identifying way possible, be spiritual about your endeavor. “Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and all else will be added unto you.”

Objection: “But I’ve Only Got an Idea. I Need More Than That.”

Take care of what needs to be taken care of, and there’s no reason to worry about future creativity or inspiration. If you’re taking a path that’s true to you, you will be inspired as you go. If you have a few ideas to get you going and are confident enough to take the leap, then get on it. Be aware that there will at times be hardship, which isn’t necessarily bad since it helps us grow, but struggle is a sign of unresolved internal blockages.

When I look back on many of my previous blog posts, I get a weird sense like, Wow. That’s amazingly inspired writing. Who did that? As arrogantly sarcastic as this may sound, arrogant sarcasm is absolutely not how I’m feeling. Instead, it’s about inspiration being so in-the-moment.

The way it is for me at least, if everything I’ve published suddenly disappeared and someone asked me to rewrite any of it, I simply couldn’t do it. I'd sit there slack-jawed, with drool running down into my keyboard. When ideas come, I work with them immediately and publish, or I write them down and let them simmer for a month or a year first. In either case, I write when I write—when it’s too early, I can’t, and when it’s viewed in hindsight, I feel like it was someone else who must have done it.

The way it works with inspiration is the way it’s going to work with everything else: You get what you need more or less in-the-moment. But it’s okay, because as long as you continue giving, Life will continue giving back. Then, you build as you go even though you’re usually not certain what tools life will present next.

Stumbling Onto Your Path

For some of you, as much as you may or may not seek your purpose, make objections, or seek to develop a talent, you may end up stumbling onto your path.

To illustrate what I mean, I’m going to use my own experience. While no one’s life will work out exactly like mine, I think there are bits and pieces that others will find useful…

I was livin’ the dream. I got an Associate’s degree in mechanical engineering technology, I failed out of my third year of college, and then I got an 8-5 job that made me miserable enough to get another 8-5 job that made me even more miserable. Although I had a talent for the work, there was a lot to be desired otherwise.

Purpose #1
A year into my second job I experienced a spiritual awakening, and about a year later I had a strong intuitive urge to leave. I had two ideas as to what I’d do and a few years’ worth of savings. However, I had no concrete plan, and I didn’t know what I’d do if I ran out of money.

Upon leaving work, I gave both my ideas a try—and for a variety of reasons neither worked out. While one of the ideas is irrelevant here, the other idea was to write a book. This was, up to that point, a mildly ridiculous idea since I’d never really written before (aside for some horribly depressing poems I’d written in my teens) and had struggled to complete writing assignments in school.

Nonetheless, I’d felt very strongly to do it, and did, in fact, sit down and write 250+ pages over the next few months. It seems to me as though the awakening had woken up a latent, alternate-life talent. I wasn’t immediately perfect at writing as I am now—joke!—but it’s been more of a “polishing up” than a “starting from ‘Go’.”

Purpose #2
The two ideas had flopped, and I knew I couldn’t go back. Uhhhhhh… Now what? I’d basically then spent my days working on a now-nonexistent blog and doing copious amounts of research to better understand what in the world this “awakening” thing was all about. At some point I ran out of money, and my family was kind enough to help support me with basic needs.

Then I had a kundalini awakening, my perceptual experience became amazing for a short bit, and soon after I had an atomic crash-landing into a dark night of the soul. I became outstandingly sick, and would spend the next 5 years working through an abundance of severe physical symptoms and their metaphysical causes. I’m now at the very end of the dark night.

Phenomenally difficult as this nightmare-in-hell process has been, among other super beneficial things, it has been revealing to me how I’d spent my life undereating and eating poorly and how to correct these imbalances.

I began playing drums in high school. I had a poor technical foundation, played very tensely, wanted to play beyond my abilities, and I struggled madly. Within a year I’d overused my muscles and joints from forearm to hand and couldn’t even shake someone’s hand without sharp pain. I did try to play again in the several years to follow, but not much had changed beyond less pain. After eight years I gave up, sold my set, and assumed drumming was over.

Nine years now after losing all but a shred of hope that I’d play again, I’m eating enough and eating healthier. The positive and rapid changes I’ve seen in my body and my joints are nothing short of outstanding. I’ve been using a drum pad now for about a year, and I’m playing very relaxed, with a much stronger rudimental foundation, more flexibility and creativity, and so on than ever before. I'm not back to optimal health yet and still have an occasional hiccup, but usually I can easily play for an hour or three at a time without any trouble.

Never could I have imagined it would work out this way. But it has. Now I have two talents that I’m passionate about and currently intend to take as far as I can.

Interestingly, when my sickness was at its worst I’d done a great deal of research into diet, health, physiology, disease, etc. One thing I’d noticed is that many of the people who have found their life path in these fields are actually only there because they’d become severely ill themselves. Conventional medicine didn’t serve their needs adequately, and so they’ve healed themselves by, or at least with, alternate means and are now helping countless people to improve their own health using what they’d learned.

I guess the point I’m trying to make is that if you can’t seem to find your purpose in life, your best bet might be to get really sick. (Joke!)

Be that what it may, stumbling onto one’s path is not for everyone…

Multiple Paths. Agonizing Indecision.

Whether you’re avoiding having any specific path or if you have multiple paths before you, it’s important to realize that sometimes we just have to make a decision because life is not going to do it for us.

A friend of mine, Julia, from Well ~ Whole ~ Empowered, told me about how she had two very different potentials in life, both of which she’d felt she would feel fulfilled in doing, but didn’t know which to take. She’d expressed to me how the uncertainty was “agonizing.”

Here is a portion of her own blog post, “How do I find my purpose in life?” This passage is the 5th of 5 traps she mentions associated with an avoidance to make decisions.
Waiting for a sign from the Universe while being stuck where you are. You'll be waiting forever! Why? Because the Universe is waiting for you to make that decision!

I am no stranger to this trap. There was a time when I was torn between two possible paths to take in life. I had quit my first career as an engineer and was considering two completely different new directions, where I would be starting pretty much from scratch. It was a scary choice: I couldn't predict how things would work out in either case; there were pros and cons to each of the two; I had talents in both. I was stuck, hoping and waiting for a sign from the Universe to tell me which way to go (while dabbling in both).

One day I received an intuitive reading, and was told that my main challenge in this life was actually to choose a path without being given much external guidance. Apparently, the soul had set up a test for itself around a certain level of learning, and I had to use everything I'd learned so far to make that decision on my own. Nothing was going to move until I made that choice, but once the choice was made, the Universe would be able to start helping me on that path.

Now, this is not everyone's life challenge, however I think this does apply to everyone to some degree. We all have the gift of Free Will and we are here for the purpose of self-expression, so why would the Universe decide for you what path to take? Wouldn't it be very limiting if everything was decided for us beforehand?
After finishing here, I recommend checking out the whole of Julia’s “purpose” post: she takes hers in a very different direction than mine and provides a lot of quality information.

Whatever the Case May Be…

Whatever your life situation, I think the point Julia makes of the need to give an answer to life as to what we want rather than waiting for life to give an answer to us is a critical one.

In general, we’ve become a people fearful of decisions, fearful of stepping outside the box, fearful of aligning with our true nature and commanding what we really want. Our lives have thus lost meaning as we unconsciously amble about trying to live for everyone else while afraid to live for ourselves.

And look how unhappy we are. Look how bland and robotic our lives have become.

If we want life to get better, if we want to realize our path and live with passion and purpose, we would do well to take some motivation from Billy (Adam Sandler) in the film Billy Madison after Miss Lippy finishes the story about “Happy” the dog:
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, Miss Lippy! The part in the story I don't like is, that the little boy gave up looking for Happy after an hour. He didn't put posters up or anything, he just sat on the porch like a goon and waited. That little boy's gotta think: You got a pet. You got a responsibility. If your dog is lost, you don't look for an hour then call it quits; you get your ass out there and you find that fucking dog!

Wednesday, January 10, 2018

My UFO Encounters

by John Boodhansingh of Zero Mindfulness

Here’s a little something different.

It’s a modified version of a collection of posts I’d written for my former blog Without a Story. It’s about my UFO sightings.

As a quick note, be aware that I’m crappy at estimating distance measurements. Hopefully the adjustments I've made to distance and size are more accurate than in the original. And distance is important because in my first two encounters the UFOs were nearly close enough to touch.

My First UFO Encounter

When I was about twelve years old (1996/-97-ish), my bedroom was moved from the second floor of the house to the just-remodeled attic. On the west wall of the room are two quarter windows. The headboard of my bed was against the window on the right, which didn't yet have a shade installed.

Holding a deep fascination for outer space, I thought I’d use the lack of window cover to my advantage. Why not peer into the night sky before going to sleep? From my 12-year-old perspective, it was a great idea. But it had only lasted about a night or two before the most peculiar of things occurred.

I was looking out the window when an object caught about 198% of my attention. There was a lime green glowing orb floating over my neighbor’s house and sometimes between our houses. It was about 10-12 inches in diameter, bright and opaque in the center and more translucent and dim toward the outer edges, and at distances ranging between about 6 and 15 feet away. It moved slowly and silently in no discernible pattern.

Quite scared, I went and told my parents. After receiving the lame answer of “probably college kids with remote-controlled airplanes,” they told me to go back to sleep. So I went and got into bed, and I pulled my blankets up and my body in against the headboard as tightly as I could in hopes that I wouldn't see the UFO again and it wouldn't see me. The next day I covered my window with newspaper.

My Second UFO Encounter

On 4/21/12, just two days after I'd originally published the above story, I went for a walk. It was one of those instances when you think beforehand you’re going to go in one direction but once walking you feel compelled to go somewhere completely different.

So, go somewhere different is just what I did. And as I was walking along, I looked to my right and noticed a cigar-shaped object, roughly 30 feet long and 7 feet in diameter, hovering about 200 feet in the air only 200 feet away. There was a valley below the object, which I was at the top of, so the object was actually quite near to eye level. (To those familiar with J. Birney Crum stadium in Allentown, PA, I was walking East on the North side of Turner Street. The object was over the bleachers and about level with the booth at the top.)

The UFO appeared to be of a very deep, dark blue color and was nothing more than a body. Meaning, there were no wings or fins or propellers or rocket boosters or any external sign of air-harvesting, exhaust, or propulsion mechanisms. Heck, there wasn’t a single visible feature such as a window, hatch, light, decal, or anything, and it didn’t make a sound.

Weather-wise it was windy, yet this object was moving slooooowly, seeming to defy the air current coming up behind it. The object was moving only slightly faster than I was walking, which was around 2 mph.

At first, this "craft," as I will now call it, moved in an easterly parallel to the road I was walking on. It stayed level with the ground and its body remained rigid. Even with the moderate wind, the craft seemed untouched: no twist, no roll, no flex, no wobble, no spin, no nothing.

Within a few minutes, a most peculiar thing happened: The craft began a slow ascent. But it wasn’t like it just began rising vertically or being blown around as a balloon. Maintaining its rigidity and its exact road-parallel positioning, the nose of the craft angled upward to 45-degrees as it made a short, curved climb, then leveled off again.

I think the best way to describe this is to say that the movements felt to me as incredibly deliberate, exceptionally measured and certain. It was as if the center point of the craft had been connected tangentially to the curves of an invisible rail system.

After making 2 or 3 of these small up-curve moves and leveling after each, the craft continued to ascend while making a very large, arcing turn northeastward. About halfway through this turn, a second most peculiar thing happened.

The as yet rigid craft began curling its body around in the sky like a snake in tight horizontal and vertical C- and S-shaped maneuvers. As with the prior movements, the C/S maneuvers looked very calculated, as if the craft had been following some preconfigured set of coordinates.

As quickly as the movements began it was over. The craft returned to its state of seemingly absolute rigidity and continued on, appearing to face northward while moving northeastward and climbing ever higher up into the clouds.

At the point I turned away to walk home, about 10 minutes into the show, the craft was hardly visible anymore.

Other Experiences

At the end of January 2013, I looked out my front bedroom window and saw the following:

Which is not to say that I’d seen a 3-color bitmap image. But this image I’d made in MS Paint is plenty accurate in depicting what I’d seen.

As much as I could tell, the sky was otherwise cloudless. Just a lonesome, flat white, symmetrically-shaped cloud wandering southward, faded a bit on the left side… and having a face… like someone had taken the world’s biggest ice cream scoop and carved it right out.

Another time I was out for a walk and saw what appeared like this:

There were some other clouds around this one, something that’s not uncommon with ships appearing as clouds, but this one just struck me as very UFO-ish. What it was I obviously can’t say, but knowing that other people have seen and photographed similar suggest to me that there may have been more to it than meets the eye.

Otherwise, I’ve had a few other UFO experiences, one of which I have a second witness for. In all of these cases, I’ve seen what appear as small, individual spheres in the sky.

Some of these I will acknowledge as most likely being balloons. For example, I saw one of them around sunset. I noticed it when it was already quite high and far in the distance. It seemed to fluidly continue its progression higher and more distant. It occasionally became brighter in a reflective way which leads me to think it was one of those reflective-back, seamed birthday balloons with Elmo or Sponge Bob on the front.

The others, however, were a more peculiar. They were small, silver/gray spheres that seemed to do their own thing, caring neither how the wind was blowing nor that gravity was attempting to pull them downward. I recall the one was about a quarter- to half-mile away and maybe 500 feet up. It just sat there completely stationary.

I can’t say with any certainty what these things were. Balloons? Maybe. ET crafts? Maybe. Anti-gravity AI devices from the government’s Secret Space Program? Maybe. I really don’t know.

What I do know is that I’ve been witness to some highly unusual things floating in our skies, several of which were much more significant than the sighting of these smaller objects.

The Obligatory Self-Help Portion

I know there are a lot of people out there who know or believe there is intelligent life off-planet, in human/humanoid form or otherwise. To you, I hope my stories have brightened your day and offer more credence to your own feelings, sightings, etc.

Why So Scared?
I’m also aware that plenty of others still think—or at least force themselves to think—ET life to be unbelievable and may see me as a fool and my words as false. If you’re in this category and have made it this far, I’d like you to consider that your rejection is not toward me or my message but toward the discomfort you feel in regard to my message.

Stop and see what’s really happening inside. Self-inquire as to what beliefs and fears, or even traumas, are keeping you so limited and how you think you’re benefiting through closed-mindedness.

Selective Ignorance
Similarly, there are things in life that scream at us: Hey! What you’ve been told is true is false! and yet people continue seeing what they want to see and will sometimes fight adamantly to maintain the false narrative.

When we simply believe what is false and thus perceive what is false, it’s understandable because it’s part of the path we all take as we evolve from ignorance to awareness. Contrarily, when we believe and perceive what is false and then fight to preserve these falsehoods to protect “who I am,” this is a problem, especially when we condemn and hurt others in the process.

Cognitive Dissonance and “Sacred Authority”
Any arising discomfort can also be used as an opportunity to see how cognitive dissonance may be distorting alignment between your intellectual, intuitive, and sensory/experiential awareness.

Having an analytical yet open mind, at the time I’d seen the cigar-shaped craft, for instance, I was able to see what I was seeing for what it was—an Unidentified Flying Object. I was able to digest the experience rationally and honor my raw perception of it defying everything I’d been told about “how it is,” “how things work,” and so forth. I’d considered other possibilities such as it maybe being a huge balloon. These hypotheses made no sense, however, based on what I’d seen and what I didn’t see or hear but thought I should have.

It’s in an instance like this where UFO-deniers could argue day and night with me (assuming I’d want to put myself through the agony) that I’m sorely mistaken and, surely, there’s a logical explanation.

But how can anyone say that what I’m asserting is not a logical explanation? Woe unto he who believes he and modern, mainstream science already know everything about everything; who believes that only “authority” has all the right answers or at least the sole right to them!

Advanced Technology
The universe is ancient beyond ancient. If we drop the Western religious notion that man was just put here—BAM!—a couple thousand years ago, who of any common sense could dare suggest that there’s no other intelligent life?

And because there is intelligent life, how Earth-centric and man-as-we-think-we-know-him-exceptionalistic must someone be to think that we are at the peak of technological evolution; that there’s not some civilization (or thousands of them) that is even a mere 1000 Earth-years more advanced than us?

Naturally, the tech issue must come up because UFO travel is obviously not via rocket power. Rather it’s blazing fast, clean, soundless, defies gravity, and would require a power source that is inexhaustible. Even if we don’t know how to do this stuff (which the military industrial complex does know), clearly someone does.

In extension, my mention of potentially seeing two crafts with cloud-cloaking technology, may not then be all that crazy… And for any Western religionists, don’t forget a cloud descended over Mt. Sinai when Moses went up to get the Ten Commandments. If he didn’t make them himself, who did? If people want to believe there's some old man in the sky named “God” who has so physically interacted with certain holy men back in the day, that's their business, but I’m not buying it.

The Messenger’s Credibility
Also consider who is providing the information.

If you know me and/or if you’ve read this blog, you know I’m an open-minded, intuitive, and intelligent individual. You know I do my research and ground a great deal of what I say in experience. You know I’m not into fear-mongering, and you know, bizarre as what I say may seem at times, that I look at my experiences from a variety of perspectives before sharing them. And I’ve certainly not been short in offering encouragement for you to do your own research—within and without, and on both sides of the argument—in order to prove what I say to yourself—or prove me wrong. The comments are always open, too—don’t be mean and don’t be shy.

Now, admittedly, I could be wrong, I could make mistakes. (I don’t think either has ever happened, but I just want to throw it out there because, as a human, it is possible. […That was a joke, by the way. You can laugh.]) But I could also be doing exactly what I came here to do, and that’s to rationally and consciously shatter the illusion that we’ve been living in and calling “reality” for far too long—a task not too many people seem up for.

“What’s In It for Me?”
Finally, consider what I or those with a similar message have to gain—or lose.

Promoting UFO and ET existence isn’t exactly a booming business. Just about everyone involved has taken flack, whether this be as minute as being called an “dumbass” or as devastating as having their houses broken into, all their possessions stolen, and sometimes even having their lives taken.

Contrarily, the mainstream, be this media, big business, the military industrial complex, or whoever, have a lot to lose in credibility, profit, power, secrecy, etc.

To Close…

I’ve seen multiple UFOs in my life, two of which were in very close proximity to me. Many others have seen, and have sometimes recorded, similar.

Are any of us perfect, know-all observers or researchers? No. Do some people make up phony stories? Yes.

But to flat-out discount all of the thousands of reports—including what government and military insiders have themselves stated—is willfully ignorant foolishness.

“Is there life out there? Good heavens! To doubt it is more than a failure of the imagination—it is a failure to recognize the limits of our own stupidity, the nescience of our science, the rudiment of our tools. We listen, we search, we hope for a sign as if our eyes and ears aren’t good enough, our brains large enough, our egos small enough.”

Saturday, January 6, 2018

As Above, So Below. As Within, So Without.

by John Boodhansingh of Zero Mindfulness

There’s an axiom you may have heard: As above, so below.

Similar to this is, As within, so without.

The point of both being that what we see on one level is a reflection of every other level: from the macrocosm to the microcosm, the physical through the spiritual, it’s all repeated over and over again, different only in presentation.

What I illustrate here is a variety of ways in which the given axioms express this ever-present, reflective nature of existence.

Individual Reflections

Let’s start at the individual level with a mirror-view of internal to external.

A simple example can be seen in a person who feels rich within experiencing richness without.

Using this type of scenario, it’s important to be mindful of what “rich” means. Of course, we cannot have inner richness in a form such as money, so inner richness must involve some realization of self-worth. Depending upon the area of inner richness, a person could experience outer happiness, financial prosperity, material abundance, and so on, each to the degree the individual believes they’re worthy of.

To point out, the mirror is the mirror even when it may not immediately appear so. If we live in a poverty-rent country, it is possible to have inner riches without the outer—the outer riches simply don’t exist for anyone, period, but that doesn’t undermine, say, an deep inner peace if one has attained it.

Similarly, we cannot force riches. Even if we win big in the lottery, if we’re miserable within, we’ll end up somehow making a big mess of things. Or if we don’t have inner riches but try to act happy-go-lucky as though we do, our behavior will be belied by a life of constant struggle (an experience which is there so we can see and heal it and attain true riches).

As a different example, consider someone who carries a deep sense of guilt, especially religious guilt since it often comes with a sense of “dirtiness.”

One person might express this perceived inner “dirt” by making a daily effort to go to confession, to do service work, and so on. Another person might perceive the same inner “dirt” but feel driven to wash their hands incessantly and bathe for extended periods.

In the former case, the person sees “sin,” and then labels it and deals with it as such. For someone in the latter case, their apparent guilt, which is mostly unconscious to them, sits in their awareness as a general feeling of “dirtiness.”

In either case, as the outer is a reflection of the inner, the body and its behaviors (external) become a mirror of the mental-emotional imbalance (internal) in order that it may become conscious and then be healed.

Metaphysical Causation and Extensions of Self

What we see as a given physical symptom of illness had its birth months, years, or even decades earlier as one or more mental-emotional distortions (i.e.: fears, false beliefs, and/or traumas). Add a life-load of these up and it becomes evident why so many people have such an inordinate number of physical maladies (no say nothing of the more mentally- and emotionally-oriented disorders).

I’d known this when I became sick nearly five years ago, so I went right to looking for connections between my bodily symptoms and their metaphysical causes. For the most part, I used the list presented here: Our Spiritual Nutrition - is05.

Yet, there were plenty of other physical problems I was having that we’re "body-not-body"-related.

You see, problems begin first at the emotional level. If emotional energy isn’t allowed to flow cleanly, if the ego-mind takes hold and says, “I refuse to feel this!” then the emotion stagnates somewhere in the body and the mind creates false reasons to prevent it from moving. As time goes on this energy becomes deeply repressed and often layered over with other issues and at some point, sooner or later, manifests as blatant physical body illness, nervous tics, etc.

If we resolve the imbalances early enough, great. But when we don't, when we’re not getting the message, our possessions become an extension of our body (and all the more subtle levels) and will in some way reflect the discord. I’ve discussed this at length in the blog post “When Is a Car Not a Car? When It’s a Mirror!”

One new item I will point out here regards my laptop (and, dang, has my laptop been a trooper). One of the most frequent issues I’d experienced while sick was inflammation. This shouldn’t be strange since perhaps all sickness implies inflammation. However, at least in my mind, inflammation also implies lots of heat: “in-flame”-ation.

What I came to notice is that my laptop’s processor would overheat whenever I was eating in such a way as to aggravate the inflammation. If I’d stop eating poorly, the overheating would stop; if I’d again eat poorly, the overheating would recur.

If I were still uncertain of the reflective nature of life, I'm pretty sure metaphysical causation would be the selling point. Although I'm not always sure how connections are made between physical issues and metaphysical causes, mirroring is commonly, dare I say, obvious—like refusing to change old beliefs, and then getting constipated, and then having a plumbing back up, and then having the car's exhaust system break.

If we'd look, we'd see the connections. Maybe not all. Maybe we'd need to develop our intuition further or ask an intuitive person for help, but life isn't holding back either. It's our choice (both conscious and subconscious) as to how much we're willing to see.

The Macrocosm, the Microcosm, the Cosmos

Another way of looking at the sameness of things is in given foods and what those foods strongly benefit.

One example is a walnut: a walnut looks like a brain, and its nutritional qualities reveal that it supports brain function. A second example is carrots: cross-sectioned carrots offer the appearance of eyes which are a very common body part carrots are known to support.

On a grander scale, solar systems bear a striking resemblance to atoms.

On top of their orbital behavior, you may have noticed, there’s a great deal of space in outer space. Zooming in to the level of an atom, tightly packed though we might imagine it to be, it too is 99.9% empty. Similarly, compare the images of a collective of neurons to (depending upon how they’re depicted) galactic supercluster maps.

As much as life is wildly diverse, it’s also much the same.

The Powers Within and the Powers Without

Of a topic far less exciting but needful to mention is politics.

People get so crazy about who’s elected into office and what they are or aren’t doing, but few realize, or at least want to admit, that this political madness is merely an in-your-face reflection of the collective consciousness.

We’ve got perverts running rampant in government, and we’ve got thorough sexual distortion in society. We’ve got money-grabbing, power-hungry heathens in government, and we’ve got poor-me, helpless-victim, blindly-faithful citizens in society.

We’ve tell ourselves, “If these two primary candidates are my only options, then I guess I have to vote for the lesser of the two evils,” and then go vote for evil, all the while wondering why our world is going to shit.

Folks, if we’d like to get real, we must acknowledge that we as a collective have merely had a cover-the-corruption government because we as individuals, and automatically then as a collective, have aggressively worked to suppress our own internal corruption.

As Above, So Below. As Within, So Without.

“Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away…”
--Revelation 21:1

Many people see heaven as a specific place, as a physical location that is eternally perfect and unchanging, where God and the angels and the saints and all “The Chosen Ones” live joyfully forever and ever, Amen.

Heaven might be better seen along these lines:

An attainable mindset and perceptual experience individually, and a “place” when a location is absent of negative energy, entities, etc. and/or when a collective of people all share the same general enlightened and positive disposition in one such a location.

As there is turmoil on earth, all dimensions of existence experience some degree of the same. As and when this turmoil is overcome, all dimensions will feel the impact.

The implication of Revelation 21:1 is therefore (in part) that in the end there will be a new heaven and a new earth because neither heaven nor earth are fixed.

As the individual renews himself, so is the collective renewed. As the collective is renewed, so is the earth renewed. As the earth is renewed, so is heaven. As heaven is renewed, so is the individual.